First, of course, I regret the time that I do not spend with them. Let's be honest, not every single minute...I do enjoy some peace! But the time that is spent on my commute, the days that I don't see them at all, that time is the time I regret. But for now, there really is nothing I can do about that time. I have to live with it, for now. Like the closing song in Avenue Q, "It's only for now".
Then there is the space in our relationship that is filled with rushing around, and frantic dinner times, and time outs, and tears. This is the space between us. The space where I'm on one side and they are on the other. And they are only 3 and 4!!! This space will grow as they do no doubt. The question is, will we just get used it? Will we all get better at it? or Will it get worse?
Who knows. The space between me and my kids is full of obstacles, tangible and not, but we also have spaces full of love and laughs, of hugs and cuddles, of hope and faith. And that's not only for now.
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